Dearest Aidan....

Well Aidan, my sweet little boy, your fourth month anniversary passed with less dramatics than your third. It fell on Easter Sunday and we had guests for breakfast which went very well and was really relaxing. In the afternoon I felt so ill that I just went to bed and dozed on and off all day. I thought of you and said quietly out loud "Aidan I love you" .

I truly wish I believed in God or heaven because then I could believe you hear me and I would see you again. But I do not have that faith, but I do believe in spirituality and meaning and purpose to all existence, I am just very unsure how it all functions and how all these jigsaw pieces fit together

I am trying to write a poem for you it will be posted here soon. I am also sorting out your photos so that I can put them up here as well.

Well that is all for today wee man, thinking of you and loving you with every beat of my heart. Love Mum